Star Wars

I found myself transported to a time long ago in a galaxy far, far away. We had a friend over on Saturday night and the two boys decided Star Wars Trivial Pursuit was the best way to spend our time. Soundtrack playing, Darth Vader noises being made by the men, we began…

Imagine, if you will: Mark – My Star Wars Nerd of a husband. Scot – Our Star Wars Nerd of a friend and me…. Not a Star Wars nerd at all. We were going head-to-head; every man for himself; dog eat dog, Jedis vs. the dark side. But I surely didn’t imagine that they would hold me to the same stringent rules that they had to follow… I mean COME ON!!! Should Mark REALLY get to roll EVERY time he answered correctly?! And shouldn’t I get a bonus of some sort for knowing Tatooine is desolate?

It started with my buddy R2D2 giving me a little help by ‘letting’ me roll 7s while others could only roll 6s. This seemed to cause a stir, but hey… R2 beeped it so.

Scot read me a question about Elephants feet being used as the feet for what creature? Well I had no idea, but Scot helped me ‘ It starts with a B,’ which didn’t seem to bother anyone until I said “Banthas!” Well, that got Mark riled up and Scot vowing no more help to those less fortunate. Heartless.

Bear in mind I suffered through many agonizing minutes while the boys took their turns – discussing Echo Station 3T8, the good and bad of planets Alderaan, Yavin, and Dagobah and dialogue. Something like “Han Ma-bookie.” Yes… that was actually said and Mark seemed to know what it meant (frightening!)

When it was finally my turn, Leia landed on a pink-pie square, though she looked more intent on taking her own life. The question: Who nodded to a disguised Leia at Jabba’s Palace. I pause, think of the scene, Mark and Scot smirk. Imagine their surprise when I say, “Boba Fett.” Then everyone was riled up that R2 helped me land on that square to begin with. Seriously boys? Do you really expect me to play with the same expertise as you? Are we not interested in a LITTLE bit of equality?

I finessed a few more pies by knowing CP30 was in the trash compactor, the name of the Sarlacc Pit, and that Ewoks appear in Return of the Jedi (much to the chagrin of Star Wars purists). But who knew Mos Eisley was a spaceport? Or Mace Windu a person… sound like planets and weapons to me.

Nevertheless, Mark won the game with a question so egregiously simple I can hardly type it here:
Who did the voice of Darth Vader? WHAT?!?!?!?! Can that REALLY even be a question? How annoying that Mark walked away with the game by knowing the great James Earl Jones uttered those famous words “Luke, I am your father.” Come on!!

Here are my proposed new rules for Star Wars Trivial Pursuit when playing with Non-Star Wars Geeks:
Star Wars Geeks (hereby known as SWG) are only allowed to roll (or push R2’s head) 3 times. Period. Then it’s someone else’s turn.
Non-SWGs get to continue to push R2’s head as long as they continue to know answers (trust me, this is still very fair – we don’t know that many answers!)
Someone should be deemed the SW judge and decide if certain questions are too easy for a true die-hard SWG.
Non-SWGs get R2’s help to roll 7 spaces.
Lastly, when a non SWG gets a correct answer – without any help – there needs to be significant rejoicing!!

May the force be with you! (Perhaps that’ll be Mark’s next game-winning question!)

**This was the longest spell-check I have ever sat through. All these silly Star Wars names**